Are you a statistic?

Of course you are.

So am I.

It is so impersonal.

Die of leukemia at 20 - a statistic.

Robbed at gunpoint – another statistic.

Have a pulmonary embolism – yet another statistic.

Just … this time round, I might be that statistic.

Suddenly it becomes personal.

CT scan at 13:45.

Details at eleven.

Note: my emotional state is fine. I am probably far too dispassionate for my own good. On the other hand, I find it hard to get worked up on speculation. The probability is that I have a viral infection of the lung lining. It hurts on my right side when I take deep breaths. But … there is just the threat of a possibility that it might be something else that I have to have all this extra testing done. Sigh. Had X-rays and an ECG last night.




[Update: 21-January-2006. The results of the CT scan show that my lungs are perfectly healthy and I have no blood clot, pneumonia, collapsed lung, cancer or anything that might explain the pain. So it is being put down to a viral infection of the lung lining.]

Comments

letter for you said…
Hope you get favourable results to your testings and scans; might just be false-alarm, hah?
God bless you!
I'm sending positive thoughts your way. I'm glad to hear that you're not letting it worry you too much, and also that the doctors are being so thorough. Good news is just around the corner, I'm sure. Take care!
Bee said…
i'll pray for God's intervention if there's anything serious.

take good care.
Oh no....
I hope everything's ok. Yes, will pray for you too. Do take care, rest well and not exert yourself too much.
Richard said…
Thank you all for your concern, kind thoughts and prayers.

The only reason I had to go through all this was because the doctors had a nagging doubt (sharp pain in chest, came on suddenly, apparently my right leg was slightly more swollen than my left).

Fortunately (and, to be honest, the odds were in my favour), the results show that my lungs are clean and clear.

The interesting thing is, even if I was rather non-plussed about it, there was still a shift in my priorities about what was important and what was not. Might blog about why that is so someday.

I think diagnosis by Internet always leads one to the worst possible conclusion (but I did get the condition right Pleurisy. However, this is just a symptom of some other underlying cause (can be found on the same page as the preceding link).

Take care.
letter for you said…
glad to hear it's benign and that you're fine!
God Bless!
Thank God for the wonderful results. Please take care of your health. And yes, I do think everyone shld take stock of their life's priorities from time to time. If you haven't done so in the past, maybe it's time to do so now....

I used to work like there's no tomorrow, but over the years I have learnt that a career is not everything. Quality of life, sleep, having a good time with friends, caring for my family, and having time for oneself - has far more intangible benefits than money and work itself.

Live each day as your last, and you will know what 24 hours mean. :)
Richard said…
Hmmm ... funny, I thought I had left a comment here ...

atkins: search engines are wonderful, but generally pretty dumb. It probably led you here because I reently had a blog on vacuum cleaners. But, you are welcome to keep coming back.

LFY: not sure I would use the word benign, since, to me at least, it implies that thre is something there, but not of concern. Technically, there is something ther (a virus - I guess).

elvina: it is fine in theory to say "live each day as if it was your last", but in practice it is much harder. Perhaps some are better at it, but I am not. Thinking that I am going to live a few more months or a few more decades has perceptible implications on how I approach life. I do want to try and hold onto that "live life to its fullest feeling", but, like most people, my memory quickly fades.

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